I have a difficult time recognizing if someone has been a jerk if it’s fairly clear it wasn’t intentional. I’m good at making excuses for other people’s bad behavior. But at what point is someone just a jerk?
A couple of weeks ago I had an encounter with an academic superior where I was spoken to disrespectfully and shocked by what was spewing out of his mouth. A few years ago I would have left with tears, but what I thought as I sat there and listened to him was, “I don’t care. I don’t want to be like you nor do what you do”. It was wonderfully liberating to walk away laughing instead of crying, with my head held high. Though, with a slightly deflated ego.